Non Sequiturs

By Michael Hawkins

~Who cares what Tiger does in his sex life? He’s good at a sport. That’s why I like him.

~Why do people listen to Glenn Beck? He’s wrong about pretty much everything.

~The Tea Party is the most ridiculous, haphazard mess since, well, the Bush Administration. I guess it hasn’t been that long.

~Obama has not earned the title “Socialist” yet. I hope he one day lives up to it.

~Time Warner is an awful company.

~So is Hannaford.

~Dogs clearly are better than cats.

~Remember Mystery Science Theater 3000? That was awesome.

~And Mr. Wizard? That was good times.

~The Caps are going to win it all this year. Damn it.

~ This is the last edition of Without Apology for some time. Maybe it will be back in the fall.

~It’s okay to weep.

~Mexican food really is awful. Just awful.

~What happened to Scrubs? Why would ABC ruin something that was once so great?

~The original aerial-view GTA was pretty awesome.

~Listen, Papi, we appreciate all you did, but that was so long ago. We don’t want to boo you, so please just hit the ball.

~And can it be said? Can it finally be said? As much as Manny would dog it down the line, Papi did, too. If anything, Papi did – and does – it far more than Manny.

~Baseball needs a serious salary cap.

~Evolution is true. Deal with it.

~Start watching Holmes on Homes.

~I wake up every day and thank my lucky stars I’m not from Mississippi.
~Of course, I don’t have lucky stars, though, because astrology is a bunch of malarkey.

~Oh, heck, I’ll mention him. Christopher Maloney is a quack.

~The best part of the Kennebec Journal is the comics.

~Except Mark Trail. Everyone HATES Mark Trail.

~Hiking is great.

~Despite popular belief, “Without Apology” does not reference a refusal to literally apologize for some given mistake. It actually refers to not qualifying every little statement with unnecessary pedantry. Nuance is okay. Not pedantry.

~Swimming across the pond at Bicentennial Park will get you “banned for life”. Trust me.

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